• Kelli Denes

The “ B” word

Maybe this isn’t the “B” word you were thinking. Recently, a wise man, asked me to omit the word “busy“ from our vocabulary. That Joel, he is really something! The thing is, this is just life right now and if you stake your claim in busy, you might miss the good stuff.

When I think about each phase of life, there were phases when we definitely felt busy. When the girls were babies (yes, both of them), it felt like chaos. With an almost 18 month old and a newborn, the nights we short and the days were hectic. The busy of the time was hands on, exhausting work of parenting. When I see new parents now, I certainly wouldn’t trade places, but they were also magical times with some wonderful memories that seem like yesterday. Busy, no sleep, total dependency, stress and worry and joy all mixed in to create that blur.

The next period of time that really stands out is when we decided to finally remodel our house. I think it was 2013 so Grey was 4, Marin was 7 or 8 and Quin was 9. We rented the little house down the road and we did a lot of the work ourselves.

In a year, our little old one room school house transformed to a normal size house. Joel worked on the house late every night after work. I drew up plans and looked at materials every night after the kids went to bed. I learned how to tile, Grey pulled nails out of the old siding, the girls helped with everything. If there was ever a time that felt busy, this might have been it. In the mix of plaster removal and tripling our house, we had picnics on the new second floor regularly and far too many great memories to count. While this was busy in the sense that they days and nights were long and our to-do lists were longer, we were having the time of our lives.

When we got close to the end, we would work so late we had an air mattress at the house and the kids would go to sleep while we kept working. When I look through the pictures, they are filled with happiness, memories and pure joy. We had a great time!

Fast forward to four years ago when I started back to school. I remember someone saying “you can’t do that”. I was shocked with this response, and it played to my biggest fear...could I manage it all? This has been our normal for four years now. This is just a phase. A phase I feel like I just started. This morning, I wrapped up one more class and now, I have two classes left. Looking back, yes, it was full. Full of hard work and juggling but I have been pushed in ways I needed, and it has been a great time of personal growth. Mixing this crazy college hat with work, being a wife and juggling three very scheduled kiddos has been hard and very busy. Again, the memories are full and the days go so quickly.

Whatever the phase is, this is life and it is full. Full of memories, full of happiness, full of joy and while each phase has its own level of busy, they have all been wonderful. I will get rid of the word busy because like always, Joel is right! If we worry about being busy, we will miss all of this good stuff! There has been a lot of good stuff mixed in.

I am am so lucky! Embrace the phase you are in and look for all of the bright lights even when you feel so busy it’s overwhelming. They are there! Focus on those, this is just a phase and the next one will come faster than you expect.

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